Reasons Why Courtship is More Important than Marriage

April 19th, 2016 || Relationships

Every marriage that is experiencing problems now  can all be traced back to its courtship stage.

 

When I was young and immature,anytime I hear someone is seeking to divorce his partner, the question I ask myself then was that what at all that these two adult individuals cannot solve that they allow their relationships to go sour. But as I grow, I have gain much understanding that some human beings think so shallow and trivial that something so simple  if not handled well, can destroy a beautiful relationship. What one individual will take for granted, the other will not. And one thing I have also realized is that most couples take courtship for granted and at the end, they find themselves wanting.

Every marriage that is experiencing problems now  can all be traced back to its courtship stage. It stems from how grievances were handled,how forgiveness was entertained in the relationship, how more effort was exerted by the two individuals and how badly they want it to work.

I have said it time and time here on this great platform that all our problems is as a result of our ignorance of ourselves and that of the environment…The truth of the matter is that don’t think that when your relationship is not working now, it will  be any better  the moment you get married. Thinking that there will be a magic wand that can just change everything to your favor when you consummate the marriage. Life doesn’t work that way.

We are all in work in progress. But understand that if the materials that make up the products are not of a good quality, the end product will not be good either. Probably you might think that by the virtue of the materials going through the various stages will make the product a quality one but that would be far from it.

 

 why you must take courtship very serious:

It affords you the time to resolve all issues before you get married

 

Concentrating on operations of the relationships means, working on the day to day aspect of the relationship. In courtship, there are some little, little threats that can turn out to be big issues after marriage. Though apparently it doesn’t pose any threat. You leave them as they were, and it becomes a huge problem you cannot solve. Remember, it is not the bigger issues that weigh us down, it is smaller issues. I know a couple who had dated for 10 years. They got married and within 3 months they were divorced. Don’t leave things hanging and believing that things will resolve by themselves…All potential threat must be recognized and be dealt with.

 

It affords you the time agree on  all values you want the relationship to hold in the future

 

Values are issues that are very important to the relationship.The two of you must  agree on values you want the relationship to hold which are likely to form the very core foundation of the relationship. Each individuals have various values they brought in into the relationship. Some can be education. Some religion. Some have idea what environment their children should grow up in. All these must be agreed upon, before the commencement married.

It affords you  Conflict resolution plan you must agreed upon

 

Don’t assume your partner knows what to do when conflict arises. The two of you must agree on how conflicts are resolved. Will the two of you like to involve a third party in resolving a serious issues? Or the two of you will solve it yourselves. There are some individuals who will kill to prevent any third party getting involve in their problems. So you got to be in agreement to prevent any surprises.

Marriages are getting destroyed for simple issues because they  take for granted courtship. Take your relationship very serious and you will have a good marriage

 

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donchaconharder@infinitythinkers.com

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